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number 29

This week I was rubbish. Totally away with the fairies and wasting time as if the hours were endless. I don’t actually know what I did, but it wasn’t writing. Apart from a few measly hours spent editing a story for a deadline this Wednesday, but really that was just to make myself feel better! Even after those hours I’m not sure if I’m happy with the story, but with the days now dwindling it may have to just do (following another quick comb through).

I don’t know why it was such a wipeout. I was high on the success from last week and felt good about my writing, but sometimes that just happens. The fall that comes after a rise and I never have been great at being measured. It’s all or nothing or… well nothing. That’s what this week was, a series of nothings plagued by guilt and annoyance at the end of it with nobody to blame but myself.

I guess I just need to write off the 29th week and get back to it. But even today feels like a lull, as if I’m caught in a wave that keeps growing and moving, but yet I have no motivation to swim out of. (This analogy is made all the more amusing by the fact torrential rain has plagued us for the past few days!) The more I write, the more I learn that you need to take advantage of those wonderful creative periods, because when they abandon you it really is tough to get back on track. Now all I can do is slink into the 30’s and see what their digits hold…

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